Wednesday, 28 February 2018

Life laundry

I’m doing a lot of throwing out as I intend to sell my current home. I’ve lived here for over 20 years and my moving in coincided with my fully acknowledging that I was trans and embracing it. I recall how, in the first weeks here, even with all the decorating and furnishing to be done, I made up for my previous purge by buying a huge new stash of clothes, from shoes and coats to skirts and nightwear… everything.

Every so often I’ve exchanged clothes with other women, be they transgender or genetic, and thrown out stuff that was worn out, no longer fitted or was out of fashion, and I’ve blogged about that in the past. I can’t seem to get my clothing to fill less than two cupboards and three chests of drawers (as opposed to one of each for the boy stuff I still have to have).

This time, though, I am doing a significant clearout and the charity shops will get some decent stuff, like these sequinned peep-toes (frankly, I can’t do five-inch heels any more!)

and the white satin pencil skirt (that wouldn’t survive a second on London’s grimy, greasy public transport system). The dustmen can enjoy the horror purchases (surely anything is better than those orange boiler suits, boys).

Ah, yes, the horror purchases. Those things that only a weirdo would design, a crook would sell and a ditzy TGirl would buy! Like this top in layered lace frills, a sort of goth ra-ra vest. One TGirl who saw it gave me a look that suggested I burn it immediately (with me still in it was the implication).

But then there are the things that are simply no longer fashionable, like 50 denier tights in avocado and turquoise that were all the rage about ten years ago. They are so soft, warm and comfortable, though, that maybe I’ll keep them just for use at home. Or the leather trousers from the MILT* era fifteen years ago. Leather legwear is in again, but as leggings and skinny jeans, not loose trousers.

*For those who’ve forgotten, MILT = mothers in leather trousers.

Clearly it’s time to throw out the shoes with broken straps, the boots that have worn through (so hard to do - I loved them! L ).

A necessary clearout, but everything I get rid of is part of my history, and I feel strong emotions of loss.

Sue x

Tuesday, 20 February 2018

Increasing outings

I haven't posted for a few weeks but that doesn't mean I've been idling. As in my last couple of posts, I've been applying my makeup regularly and going out in the locality just to get used to the feeing of being seen as female again after the few years I couldn't. No selfies to show this time but I am quietly revelling in being just another woman in the street. 

I've said it before, the joy of doing ordinary, banal, everyday things, but in one's true gender, beats even the most glamorous transgender party hands down. It does for me anyway. I just want to be treated as a woman, a lifelong desire that it's taken me so long to fulfil.

Sue x