Trans visibility and Lily Savage

 It's trans day of visibility again. I dress as a woman now even if I'm not obviously feminine much of the time. Will that do? Given that my uncle, whom I saw today, made some joke about all those transgenders there are around nowadays, he seemed to miss the one right in front of him. So let me be more effectively visible by posting to my blog.

It's never been a good time to be trans. I thought things were getting better, and in some places they are, but in others things are regressing.

I was saddened to hear of the death this week of British television star Paul O'Grady who, as Lily Savage, brought drag into everyone's living room. By no means the first female impersonator or drag queen on TV, Lily Savage was different as she seemed to speak to, and for, a lot of women. When she became the presenter of celebrity quiz show Blankety Blank you suddenly had a family-oriented show hosted by a drag queen and nobody thought it weird. She did a great deal for the LGBT community in this way. And then Paul hung up the high heels and Lily was no more but he continued to present shows as himself. People said he was humane and approachable, always standing up for people's rights yet remaining witty. An important advocate for us has passed away and will be very much missed.

Lily Savage, from her Facebook page

Love to all my trans friends

Sue x

Women's Day and more

 Every day is children's day, they say. Every dog has his day, they say. Today is International Women's Day, so third place is not bad. Could do better. Pardon my slightly cynical opening but I see women's place in society is still in need of improvement, and that certainly goes for trans women. Still, I'd like to wish a happy women's day to all. 

Here the mimosa (also known as silver wattle) is the gift given to women on this day and the fluffy yellow blooms are brightening up the local hillsides right now.

The rest of my post has a decidedly international flavour, too.

Veronika Arden's World

I've added this interesting blog from Austrian blogger, Veronika, to my blogroll. She likes to go out sightseeing and shopping in what is evidently a rather beautiful part of the world and has a lot of photos of her and her region. Welcome Veronika, and thank you for your comments.

Veronika writes in German but there is a translation button so you can select English ... or any other language, from Kazakh, Punjabi and Zulu to Scots Gaelic. Take your pick. Or tok ya pok. Or towk yarr pekk. You get my drift.

Veronika's blog

 

Brianna Ghey, RIP

I was very affected by this poor girl's unjust death in Cheshire, where I live when I am in Britain. Her funeral will be on March 15th and the theme will be pink. I approve of pink! Details from Cheshire Live: Brianna Ghey funeral arrangements 

Her family and friends requested a bit of online help to give her a fitting sendoff. Their target of £4200 has ballooned to over £113,000 and counting. I hope this and the crowds expected to attend will give her a really beautiful memorial and show that love trumps hate.

I had an email from the organisers that I would like to share:

Thank you everyone for your generous donations. Our family have been overwhelmed with the positivity and support we have received during the hardest weeks of our lives. If Brianna could see the amount of support she has received she would be thrilled.
Thank you xxx

Rest in peace, lovely.

 

Spain

I tried to go to Barcelona last month but strikes put paid to my plans. So I am trying again next week and may be offline from this Saturday onwards. As well as a bit of sightseeing, I'd like to get a feel for what trans life might be like there. It seems to be particularly vibrant.

 

Lost in trans-lation

A final comment on translation bots like the one Veronika has from the master himself, C-3PO:

Sue x

If life gives you lemons ... wear them!

 So my last post was about wearing pink all over. How about yellow?

Today I went to Menton, which is the first town across the border, to catch the tail end of the annual Lemon Festival, when statues made of oranges and lemons are on display.

 

I was in Menton just after new year. It's a pretty town, but expensive to live in. Which wasn't always the case as much of its revenue used to come from fruit picking, which is never the best-paid trade. The Prince of Monaco, the former ruler here, was short of cash and decided that what his coffers needed was a tax on lemons. But trying to introduce this tax in the late 1840s when much of Europe was in the throes of revolutions was a disaster as Menton and much of his principality declared independence and sought the protection of the neighbouring Kingdom of Sardinia. Which might have worked out but that kingdom itself soon took over the Italian peninsula, requiring a bit of French help in the early stages, for which the fee was Sardinian lands west of the Alps. The French promptly annexed this unofficial protectorate of Menton, not before arranging one of their Putinesque referendums to confirm that the locals were delighted with the idea of being part of France. Shortly after, the Prince of Monaco came up with the genius idea of getting most of his income from a swanky casino that only foreigners could attend, thus leaving his remaining subjects virtually free of direct taxes, unlike the citizens of Menton who now have to deal with hefty French income tax. The law of unintended consequences is enough to make anyone bitter as a lemon, eh!

Anyway, here are the huge statues made of lemons. The fruit is sold off cheaply at the end of the festivities, although I noticed that they cheat by using coloured balls for some of the upright parts! 

 

I found a decent place to eat behind the market house. You know it's decent if the locals eat there. Having enjoyed a mixed plate of local specialities the waitress asked if wanted dessert. I asked what there was for dessert...

"Lemon tart"

"Or?" I prompted.

And I got a look from her! Sue, you silly! It's the lemon festival in the city of lemons. It's lemon tart all the way!

I opted for the lemon tart.

Which was pretty good!

Anyway, last time I asked if all-over pink was a good look. It's certainly trending. As for all-over yellow ...

Sue x

Space for everyone, and the Drab Drink

 Thank you for the nice comments on my last post about the closure of the Scooter Café in London. It's a shame they've decided to throw in the (tea)towel but I expect a similar venue will arise there. 

I thought it worth adding a bit more detail to this as Lower Marsh is the sort of street that caters to anyone and everyone and illustrates how people of all sorts can live happily together despite obvious differences and preferences. And a regular trans event used to be held there.

At one end of the street is a lively Cuban bar, at the other a pub frequented by bikers. Along the way you pass stalls selling street food from round the world (oh, and a Greggs for the home crowd), an Asian supermarket, a railway bookshop with everything for the trainspotter about town, cafés and restaurants of all sorts, a costume shop for partygoers, a small art gallery, and other shops and businesses. In the middle is Lounge 34, a cocktail bar that used to be the monthly venue for the well-attended trans event known as the Drab Drink, which is for London TGirls who are unable to get out dressed but who want to meet others similarly placed. More on the Drab Drink, then and now, below.

So salsa fans and hairy bikers, hobby geeks and fancy dress partygoers, local residents and office workers wanting a sandwich, theatregoers and commuters wanting to eat or drink out, TGirls in stealth and not... a huge mix of people in the one place who rub along very well. This is how a commercial street should be, something for everyone. A far cry from places that are suspicious of anything from outside their community. It's the sort of place where I can thrive, not the type of sterile world created by social, political or religious bigotries. The family I grew up in would hate it, but that's their loss.

Anyway, if you want more on the Scooter Café, so-called as it was previously a motorcycle repair shop, try this short illustrated review by the Veteran Vespa Club (there was an old Vespa scooter in the window): Scooter Caffè.

 

They're right, the Italian form, Scooter Caffè is actually what it was called. Apparently the café featured in one of the Bourne films. It was a studied shabby chic that understated the quality food and drink, and attracted a youngish crowd (so I felt totally at home lol!)

As an aside for history buffs, just behind here is the former entrance to the Funeral Trains platforms of Waterloo Station. The best explanation of this service I've ever come across is from vlogger Jago Hazzard, whose dry sense of humour may appeal ("the dead had their own coffin tickets, though presumably return fares weren't available") and who has a lot of shots of the area, including some of the grot that still persists. If you want an idea of how Britain was divided by class and faith, the funeral train service is one of the best illustrations you could wish for. The eclectic South London of today is very different.

Drab Drink

I'm pleased to see that this event is still going and is now called the London Trans+ Meet Up. It's an informal meet-up on the first Thursday of every month. You do not need to dress to attend. Fuller contact details by clicking here.

The next meeting will be this Thursday, 1 September, from 7pm at the Retro Bar in George Court just off the Strand (WC2N 6HH). (George Court is not easy to find despite being off one of the capital's main thoroughfares but it is on the south side of the Strand sandwiched between the Halifax Building Society and Superdrug, very near the pedestrian crossing leading from the Charing Cross Police Station/William IV St junction.) 

I attended Drab Drink once when it was in Lower Marsh. That was when my skin problem precluded my wearing makeup. Oddly, I don't seem to have written about it on my blog at the time. But I found it friendly, non-judgmental and a way to meet other trans people in an informal way. 

I wish them every success.

Sue x

Pride Week conclusion

 A short post to say that overall the first Sanremo Pride Week was deemed a success by the organisers and they plan to hold another next year. I hope this will be a regular event ... until the day such events are no longer deemed necessary. 

As well as the pro-LGBT Countercongress last Tuesday, there was a photographic exhibition in the civic centre over the weekend and a dedicated comedy show in the casino on Saturday evening. Police estimate about 1500 people showed up for the march, which is more than was expected in this relatively small centre.

Another photo released by the organisers

 

The mayor signed the council up to improving LGBT rights in the area, as did other official bodies. There's a way to go here as anywhere else, but when my old country, the United Kingdom, has this very same week agreed to ban conversion therapy for gay people but not for trans people, I know where I am better off. Patria est, ubicumque est bene*.

Here, therefore, is a classic ethical thought experiment for my UK friends ...

Maybe next year I'll feel a bit more confident and glam again and will be more prominent at Pride.

* One's homeland is where one feels right (Cicero, Tusculan Disputations V, 37, 108, quoting a line from Teucer, a play by Pacuvius)

 

Life after Covid

Just for the record, the weekend also saw the revival of the antiques fair, a pro-Ukraine rally and my first breakfast in a café for two years. 

 

Antiques fair

Life feels different now - not what it was before Covid, but it's beginning to approach it.

I don't like Russian dolls - they're just so into themselves!

Sue x

Pride Week part 2

 Yesterday was Sanremo Pride, the first ever in this area. Sanremo has a population of just over 50,000, so not a large place, but it's lively and is famous for its music festival and for being the City of Flowers since much of the cut flower market is supplied from here. So when estimates of 1000-3000 people turn up for Pride, that's quite a success. So much so that the march was halted part way as all those people wouldn't have fitted into the main square, which was supposed to be the final destination. I suspect the car rally going on and the Palm Sunday preparations (little old ladies wandering about with sacks of palm fronds*) probably made the police feel there was enough chaos going on for one weekend!

My photos are not that great (it's hard to capture crowds from within) but here's one from the start of the event by the old fort.

There are people from all hues of the LGBT spectrum. The organisers posted this last night. (Presumably their photographer is 12 feet tall!)

This photo reminds me of Canal Street in Manchester, UK, during the annual Sparkle trans event.

I tried taking an 'atmospheric' photo of the event from across the harbour but the flags are a bit lost in the distance. Still, it places it in context.

There are no photos of me as I wasn't properly 'me'. I dress androgynously these days but, after some years of health problems, isolation and pandemic chaos, I have lost a lot of confidence, as I said last week when talking of Transgender Day of Visibility. I need to feel less 'ugly', regain some mojo, if you know what I mean. So I felt a bit on the periphery. Still, it was right to go and I'm glad I did.

My way home happened to pass the prize giving for the Sanremo Rally, so here are some photos that have nothing to do with Pride!

As well as trophies, winners (male and female) get a bunch of fresh local cut flowers (which they've placed on the roofs of their vehicles here). Nice to see the car at the front (3rd place) has a female navigator (Giorgia Ascalone) - it's not just a sport for boys. Who says girls can't navigate?

And the prize for the most glamorous TGirl goes to ...

 

All in all, it was a good afternoon.

 

*Palm Sunday - a bit of history

Palm Sunday is important in the area, too, as the palms for the Vatican are grown here. Down the road at Bordighera there is date palm grove, the northenmost naturally seeded stand of them. They grow this far north because of the unusually mild climate. The Vatican gets its palm fronds from here because of an incident in Rome in the sixteenth century.

The obelisk in St Peter's Square, originally from Egypt and then set up in ancient Rome, was placed as the centrepiece of the square in 1586. The occasion was deemed by the pope to be so solemn that he forbade any of the workmen to talk whilst it was hoisted into position, on pain of death. As the lifting progressed, one of the foremen, Benedetto Bresca, a ship's captain from Sanremo, noticed the ropes overheating from friction and cried out "water on the ropes!" He was arrested but the architect acknowledged that it was only his intervention that had saved the obelisk from falling and smashing because the ropes were on the point of burning. So the pope, instead of executing him as threatened, rewarded him with the right to supply palms for Palm Sunday from his local area.

There is a pretty little square in the centre of Sanremo named after him (Piazza Bresca). It's free of traffic and has a fountain in the middle with an obelisk recalling the event.

 

Today, then, the Bishop of Sanremo-Ventimiglia, who is a real homophobe, was thankfully too busy overseeing palm distribution to disturb the Pride event.

A dip in the archives

My last pride event was in London back in 2018, quite a while ago now (thanks Covid!). Here's my write-up of the day, which I went to with a gay friend and another transwoman.

Link: London Pride 2018

 

Sue x

Pride Week part 1

 Fifty years ago this week the International Congress on Sexual Deviancy was arranged in the casino in Sanremo, Italy, where psychiatrists and doctors met to try to make out that LGBT people were freaks. A small but vocal protest by the gay community saw the first clear Out and Proud banners and slogans, and was instrumental in changing attitudes. 

 

Funky 1972

On Tuesday, the same venue hosted a Countercongress celebrating LGBT life and showing how much progress there has been in improving rights since. There's quite a way to go yet but what improvements there have been! 

This event opened this celebratory pride week. Tomorrow an LGBT photographic exhibition will be unveiled in the Sanremo civic centre and there will be a pride parade in town. As far as I know this is the first one in Sanremo, not a large city but certainly a lively one. 

It also happens to be the same weekend as the Sanremo Rally. How pride paraders and racing cars will get round each other, I'm not sure. A gay rally meets a gay rally!

Outside the casino today

More news in part 2 after the weekend's events.

Sue x

Crowds allowed

 As if to defy my last post - which is welcome - this weekend had a lot  going on, almost as if life was normal. Having to wear a facemask indoors and in crowds and to show your Green Pass vaccination certificate when eating out is still pandemic-minded but the fact that this weekend you were allowed to attend big public events without other restrictions is a welcome step.

Yesterday, the international cycling season opened with the annual Milan to Sanremo cycle race, the Classicissima, the longest race in the calendar at around 300 km (185 miles) and unlike the past two years the public was allowed to stand along the route.

I didn't go to see it, cycling not really being my thing, but today I went into town where there were various events. I have been quite troubled by this Ukrainian war, as you'll have gathered from previous posts, so I joined the peace rally and felt comforted to be with others who feel the same.

 

Note to self: to get best photos of a crowd, it's best to be outside the crowd!

There was also the Book & Bike Fair in the main square and I love a good browse. 

 

A local author persuaded me to buy her novel about a woman who, according to the blurb, feels there's something missing in life. A postcard from a mountain village where she felt truly happy convinces here to return there and live a more authentic life. Hmm, a woman leading a more authentic life... Now why did that appeal, I wonder? I'll let you know what I think when I've read it.

There was also a band playing and it was good to hear live music in the open again. Pity they had the bus station as a backdrop but I guess these guys and gals are into sounds not sights.

I also treated myself to Sunday lunch in a cosy family-run restaurant which was quite full, a sign of the economy picking up. I love eating out (as regular readers will know only too well), and it's not just because someone else does the cooking and washing up! Frankly, I've been getting a bit bored with my own cooking these last two years!

Though sunny, it was a windy day but ideal for kitesurfing! 

(That's not me, by the way!)

So it's been a weekend that was, well, relatively exciting, at least as far as the Covid Era goes. It's a good sign of people rallying together and getting back to normal weekend activities. Fingers crossed.

A dip in the archives

I've been a bit neglectful of my dip in the archives that was a regular feature last year, but other things have been on my mind of late! But the subject of restaurants leads me to this apt post from March 2014 when I spent two days eating out with the girls in London. What fun times. And lots of photos of happy TGirls at table!

Link: Two days of what I do best 

Sue x

Triumphant transgender barmaids

 A bit of nostalgia. It was ten years ago that 30 or so trans girls acted as barmaids at the Olympia Exhibition Centre in London. We had been invited to man (if that's the right word) a new feature, the TGirl bar at the Erotica Show, an annual trade show. (Before anyone throws their hands up in horror at the thought that trans women might be associated with the sex trade, I'd point out that the Erotica show was just another trade fair and about as erotic as your grandad's undershorts. "Erotica" was just a marketing tool: I bought jewellery, jeggings and a hairclip there, but declined the cavity wall insulation and toffee-flavoured vodka also on offer!)

First shift 2011: waitresses (left) Ria and Stella; barmaids Mandy, Helena, Andrea, Amanda, Eve, Jackie, Holly and me.

 

For us, it was an outreach opportunity, a chance to educate the public and show that we trans women are decent, approchable and friendly. 

 

We were so popular that they unhesitatingly invited us back for the next show, in a different venue in 2013.

Cute barmaid

 

The 2011 show had us all dressed in plain outfits: white shirt, black skirt, just what any smart waitress or barmaid would wear. In 2013 we left uniformity and went a bit more fetish, but with a loss of charm in my opinion. 

The Sunday shift 2013

 

It was hard work. I had two girls to stay on each occasion, which is tiring even if fun, and the rota was serious. Pouring drinks for several hours whilst standing on very high heels takes stamina. But we were highly praised by managers and visitors alike and I think we got the message across that TGirls are personable, hardworking and, actually, very normal, sociable people. We answered visitors' questions about trans life and that's always good as those newly educated folks then pass the info on. 

The magnificent Olympia hall in 2011, with Holly, Joanne and Ria

 

Altogether a success, in my view. It's a pity this event ended after that for financial and organisational reasons. But the trans community being promoted in London's top exhibition venues was an honour and a big win. I'm proud to have been part of it.

TGirls on the burlesque stage, 2013

 

My report on 2011: Barmaids a go-go

My report on 2013: The TGirl Bar 2013 

(NB The latter has always been the most popular post on my blog with lots of photos and many links to more photos, blogs, performers and suppliers.)

 

Sue x

Good trans news

 The weather continues to be beautiful and two good pieces of news have reached me from my old home in Britain: the "Nottingham Invasion" event celebrated its hundredth outing last week, and a court of appeal ruling overturns a recent judgment so that puberty blockers are again available to trans children.

See my dip in the archives below for news on the Nottingham Invasion.

For the court ruling, you could do worse than read Claire Flourish's well-written assessment here: Doctors can give medical treatment to trans children

As for me, I feel that now that the summer season is winding down, the outdoor pool has just closed till next year and I am vaccinated in a country that is being very cautious with Covid, it's time to start doing the tourist thing again. I live in a very picturesque region with a lot of history. Photos in due course!

Very September scenes: morning glories and misty mountains

  

A dip in the archives

So the Nottingham Invasion made it to 100 outings last Friday night. The event started nearly ten years ago to encourage TGirls to go out en masse to regular nightclubs, bars and venues not specifically dedicated to the LGBT community. I went a few times in 2012-14 and these posts are among the most popular on my blog. I even had a comment from a Nottingham carpet supplier after my thoughts on the carpet in Oceana!

Nottingham Invasion

Nottingham Invaded Again 

Nottingham: My Third Invasion

Nottingham: The Only Place to Invade!

In the Revolution bar, Nottingham, 2014 with Rachael and Rachel

Yes, that's the Nottingham, England, where Robin Hood outwitted the Sheriff, where King Charles I raised his standard, and where the Trip to Jerusalem is claimed to be the oldest pub in England. The city is worth a visit in its own right: Nottingham tourism

The only joke I know about Nottingham: 

    Robin Hood and his Merrie Men broke into a music store last night.

    They made off with the lute.

Sue x

Lingerie for TGirls and men

 Somewhat related to my last post about finding suitable swimwear is the question of how many TGirls choose lingerie for men or lingerie specifically designed for MtF trans people. 

There are several firms that make lingerie specifically for TGirls, i.e. lingerie that takes into consideration the usually flatter, broader chests for bras or the slimmer hips and rears and fuller fronts for panties/knickers that are often characteristic of MtF trans people who haven't had the op or hormones. Some of these items seems very pretty. I have never ordered from firms like En Femme (US) or Carmen Liu Lingerie (UK) or Petit Cyclone (France) myself but specialists like these and many others seem to have a good following.

A long time ago I came across a company called Homme Mystère from Australia and I was curious about how many men choose specially made male lingerie. I am delighted that they do - let's face it, men's standard underwear is horrible: nasty to look at and unpleasant to wear. At least, I have always thought so. A firm like this gives men the chance to wear something pretty, soft, flattering and, in my view, much more suitable than men's official underwear styles. And now men can complement their wives'/girlfriends' choices, too.

I have never bought any of these specialist products myself, either those designed for MtF transgender people or those designed for men. And the reason for this is simply that I feel my femininity is such a strong part of my trans nature that I am keen to have only clothing specifically labelled for women. So even when presenting as male (more usually androgynously) it is still clothes from the womenswear department that I am in. This may seem excessive or obsessive but after years of being forced to suppress my trans nature I am just keen to emphasise my femininity as much as possible! Yes, I dare say I have been losing out on some good, more comfortable, enhancing underwear, but being a woman among women has been my lifelong need. 

But never say never. Maybe I'll try out, say, a pushup bra from a made-to-measure trans-specific company soon just to see if there is a clear improvement. I doubt I will ever go for lingerie for men, though. I am just not masculine enough!

I am still compiling a resources page which will include links to suppliers. Here are a few up-to-date reviews of specialist suppliers:

Byrdie: 5 inclusive and empowering lingerie brands for the trans community

Pink News: the best, cutest and most popular trans lingerie ... 

Hannah McKnight: Lingerie for men - does it matter? 

On a related note, here's news from the BBC about creating a universal sizing guide for trans women, which is currently lacking:

BBC: Trans clothing - designer works to create standard sizes

 

A fig tree and two agaves growing close to home. Figleaves were the first undergarments ever, according to the Bible, but some modern styles feel more like the hard, chunky, scratchy agave. Ouch! Choose wisely.

 

A dip in the archives

Well done to Femulate for making available its huge collection of photos from US college yearbooks with 'boys' who preferred to present as female:

Flickr: yearbooks 

As I mentioned in my dip in the archives on 28 June, events such as school proms, plays, Hallowe'en parties, womanless beauty pageants and such events have often been a lifeline for trans or just gender curious people to express themselves in an environment that is less judgmental than home or the local community. It is an interesting collection and quite a cultural phenomenon.

Sue x

Sparkle: a tribute

 Sparkle is the UK's national transgender celebration, always in Manchester on the second weekend of July. It's become more of an international celebration, in fact, with many people coming specially for it from abroad. I've known friends from Hungary, Norway, Austria and Ireland attend. But last year and this year it had to be cancelled because of the pandemic. I know that some girls did a "Non-Sparkle" in Manchester anyway and I hope they were able to have fun. I believe there's a virtual event and I dare say highlights will be available online. Here's the website: Sparkle 2021 website

Sparkle began in 2003 as a day-event. The next year it became a weekend. When I first went in 2010 there were, I'm told, 1500 people there. By 2015, as many as 10000 attended. It's been a huge success and a great event for trans people and their families to meet and have a good time. It soon became the highlight of my year. Knowing what it takes to organise these things, a big tribute must go to those who founded and grew this event. Thank you for all the fun.

 

I hope it can go ahead next year.

A dip in the archives

So the Sparkle weekend ten years ago during my first major Femmathon, as I called my period living full-time female, was one of the best times I've ever had in my life.

In my last posts I said how Emma and I had enjoyed a few days together in London with trips to other cities. The journey to Manchester was long but saw us in the city on the Thursday afternoon when other attendees were already gathering. We had dinner in Eden's, which I've always quite liked as a venue.

Texting in Eden's

Sparkle Friday is when it all starts to get going and the first organised events begin. I had attended most of the official events the previous year as a newbie so this year I made it more spontaneous, although the official welcome party at REM in the afternoon was something to redo, as a chaperone for new girls who were nervous.

My pretty summer frock for Friday afternoon

It was great to meet up with old friends like Wilhelmina and Maddy and meet new ones. I always try to get to know two or three new people when I attend a big event.

The main day is, of course, Saturday with all the big entertainments in Sackville Gardens ("Sparkle in the Park"), as well as Canal Street and the Gay Village. It was so lively all day and, as I mentioned regarding the previous year's Sparkle, I felt I was where I really belonged. 

I had arranged a big lunch at Villaggio's restaurant in Canal St for the UK Angels and was delighted to have 16 people there. 

Angels Lunch 2011. Photo by Hazel. At my table are Ange, Chrystal, Tina, Holly and Amanda. Beyond, Michelle, Amy, Maddy, Emma and several partners. Wilhelmina had to leave early.

I spent the afternoon in the Park, which is a great place to bump into people and catch up, including friends like Maria and Joanne whom I'd met the previous year. 

Sparkle in the Park with Joanne. Photo by Sheila Blige.

There's a stage with bands, various acts and shows; stalls selling clothes, jewellery, wigs and makeup; stands and representatives for various organisations; refreshment stalls; and so on. And although Manchester is almost synonymous with rain, this year (and every other year I've attended) was sunny and dry.

Sparkle Sunday turned out to be the best day, even though the official events were winding down by this point. It's fun just to sit out at a table on Canal Street and flag friends down to join you. The drink of choice at Sparkle is strawberry cider with its rich pink colour and outdoors on a hot day this goes down very well. 

As I had in the previous year, I went with Joanne and Zazoo to the official meal in Manchester's "Curry Mile". I've always felt it important for TGirls to expand their comfort zone and move out of the 'safe' clubs and gay areas and into the real world. So we had a sit-down Indian meal, followed by ice cream from one of the nearby shops.

I confess that I've forgotten some of the chronology at this distance in time - a drink in a pub with Paula, dancing in Napoleon's and in other clubs, and a champagne breakfast ... I enjoyed every moment.

Relaxing in the hotel

It's a great event. You can attend the official entertainments or just enjoy the venues of the Gay Village with your friends. That year the Equalities Minister addressed the event and, although her speech was not profound, her attendance marked an important boost for the profile of the trans community ... it's a pity things have changed for the worse since then.

It's always sad to return home afterwards but I still had another full week of fem time left. More on that next time.

Sue x

 

Cari lettori italiani

Non so se c'è un evento nazionale in Italia per persone transgender. Ma l'evento annuale che descrivo oggi è speciale. Divertente ma anche molto d'aiuto. Da origini modeste è diventato molto grosso. Peccato che quest'anno come l'anno scorso hanno dovuto abbandonarlo.

Sue x

 

The fact is, trans people make the world a better place

It was five years ago today that something horrible happened, the start of a chain of events, that completely changed my life and I'm still living in random, uncertain times. Yet in all the subsequent chaos, it's my trans and gay friends who have been the most supportive, despite - or maybe because of - the fact that society often treats them badly.

A trans person: a danger to society! Brrr! Shudder! Run away!

 

To explain, very briefly, how it began. I used to live in an area of homes built uniformly in the 1950s. Some had balconies and on 17 June 2016 one of those balconies collapsed. To cut a long story very short, that balcony had been built with almost no steel in the concrete, yet had still survived 60 years. Unfortunately, that property was let, and the letting agents tried to cover the mistreatment and overloading it had had by making out that all similar properties were faulty and they would act to have our homes condemned. We might lose our homes if they had their way. This was all a lie, of course. They were crooks trying to cover up their neglect. 

The following week the UK referendum on leaving the EU left my industry in the doldrums for five months, and it has never properly recovered. The prospect of losing my home and my livelihood unexpectedly in the space of less than a week put me in a tailspin of anguish. 

Few of my vanilla friends cared, and even dismissed my concerns. But my trans friends rallied round. One who was a surveyor drove 130 miles to advise me and my neighbours on what to do about ensuring that our properties were safe from collapse. Her advice was taken up in the four streets affected and, after suitable structural surveys, we found that everything was fine. The one faulty balcony had simply been badly made on the day it was built - a one-off - and the letting agents who'd whipped up this panic were clearly dishonest crooks. 

As for the post-Brexit British so-called governments under psycho Theresa May and mendacious, corrupt narcissist Boris Johnson, I'd much rather deal with the mafia.

Many trans friends rang me, messaged me and consoled me in 2016, even those I hadn't heard from in a while, sending me no end of loving support. One sent me a hand-made gift that I consider priceless. 

When I was later hit by a bicycle whilst doing home removals, which wrecked one of my legs so I couldn't walk properly for two years and is still causing some problems, it was my 'alternative' friends who helped me with my last days of moving. Then the surveyor TGirl took me into her home for a fortnight to recuperate and learn to walk on crutches before I could move to a new home offered to me by a gay friend of mine. 

Covid has hardly helped with earning and socialising, not for me or for anyone. But, again, I have gay and trans friends contacting me all the time as I get by alone, as well as friends who have more alternative lifestyles and unusual beliefs. 

So it's my trans and gay and 'different' friends who have always stepped up. That's right, the ones society tries to discriminate against. Whereas my smug, hetero, rich, supremacist, transphobic or trans-indifferent 'friends' and family care much less.

So thank you, LGBT+ community. My friends know who they are and I have saved any embarrassment by not naming them here. And yet it is we LGBT+ people who have to claim rights from callous, incompetent governments!

 

Sunday saw my local regional Liguria Pride in the port of Genoa, Italy (see photo), which was the first pride event and the first major national event after lockdown. 8000 people turned up in the city centre, which was a good turnout under the circumstances. There's a new anti-discrimination law going through the Italian parliament that should afford good protections against the various phobias around. Intelligently, they've coupled LGBT rights with protections for women and disabled people, which gives a better chance of the bill becoming law.

Why should there be this need to beg for protection from the callousness of hetero or religious or extremist or ultrafeminist or other bigoted and ignorant people? 

If you're a Christian or a Muslim, didn't your saviour/prophet point out that the outsiders like tax-collectors and prostitutes, foreigners like Romans or Samaritans, were the folk who were really doing things right rather than the religiously correct? Yet my religious family, like so many others, hates people like me.

You're straight or masculine. Cool. Some people aren't. If you were as strong as you claim, as confident, you wouldn't be bothered that others weren't like you. You'd happily defend the fact the some people are different because it wouldn't actually diminish your life or confidence in any way.

My trans and gay friends have helped me unhesitatingly in these last few awful years. They're the good ones. Be proud of LGBT+ folk in this pride month. I am.

A warm hug to all you humane and loving people. You have helped me survive the worst years of my life. I think and hope I reciprocate. It's maybe a sign of emotional maturity that those who struggle most look out for others who also struggle.

A dip in the archives

 In 1972, a conference was held in Sanremo, NW Italy, a town best known for its music festivals. The conference was dedicated to "deviant behaviour in human sexuality". It wasn't exactly a gay or trans friendly event! There was a protest by gay activists, the first such demonstration in Italy.

Next April sees the first Sanremo Pride in commemoration of the 50 years since this protest, and the huge progress that has been made since then. I hope to attend. 

Sue x

Cari lettori italiani

Il successo di Liguria Pride ci da speranza per il successo della legge Zan e la lotta contro l'omotransfobia.

In questa data cinque anni fa è successo un disastro che ha iniziato una serie di disastri per me che non sono finiti: il crollo di un balcone che ha suscitato polemiche e paure dove abitavo a Londra, seguito dal voto inglese per lasciate la communità europea che mi ha tolto il lavoro, poi il razzismo e la corruzione che hanno accompagnato quel voto, il danno fisico che ho sofferto quando mi ha investito un ciclista e il disastro del Covid che ci coinvolge tutti. In questi cinque anni i miei amici transgender e omosessuali sono stati dei amici veri e sinceri e mi hanno aiutato senza esitazione. Ne sono fiera.

Sue x