In the Noughties, when I was building up to my emerging as a trans woman, I received a lot of help and advice from other TGirls about all sorts of things - where to go, where to get good hair and makeup, what undergarments work and, not least, the emotional support needed to brave the world. It was of incalculable benefit to me.
Once I was confident, I felt able to help new girls myself and will always do so. There is a lot of genuine support from many in the trans community for one another. It is one of the things that struck me in my early days.
So if you are trying to come to terms with being trans and how it affects your future, do not be afraid to ask. People will be willing to help. And when you have experience to share, be generous with your support. We have all struggled to come to terms with being trans.
This month I've provided tips on selecting perfumes as a trans person and three posts on aspects of relationships. To judge by the feedback I've received, these have been useful and interesting. This sort of feedback is helpful so that I know what is well targeted and what isn't. I have even had one suggestion that my thoughts and tips on trans life should be compiled to make a book for a wider audience - I'm flattered and I will consider it, though publishing books is exhausting, I can tell you.
Similarly, just in the last week, we have useful tips on body shaping from Lynn's Yet Another TGirl Blog (Lessons Learned VIII), Stana's Femulate (Décolletage) and Hannah McKnight (A perfect balance)(Moot Lingerie). All very handy, helpful and freely-offered advice.
Transgender Day of Visibility is on March 31st. Let's hope that many trans people can be visible despite current restrictions all over the world on movement. This helps to let the world know that we are here and part of real life. For some of us it will be online only, sadly, but that's better than nothing. At least I've been able to blog more in this lockdown year than previously.
After all, there have been many trans and gender fluid wins already this month; those I mentioned and, of course, Elliot Page featuring on the front cover of Time magazine. An excellent and very high-profile actor, his coming out also takes the focus off the eternal debate on (and abuse of) transwomen to show that transmen exist, too.
I'd like to add to these my friend Allie Paltrow's recent feature in Transliving magazine, a useful resource for the trans community from Shane Marcus. Allie has always been very stylish and feminine and illustrates how to be the trans girl about town. Allie said to me that "if by sharing it can inspire more girls to try to live their best trans life then I will be very proud".
Best wishes to all in the trans community and to our friends and allies.
A dip in the archives
International Transgender Day of Visibility (TDOV) began only in 2009 but I see it as a milepost in the trans calendar and a positive foil to the distressing Transgender Day of Remembrance in autumn.
A short post I made about it three years ago after I managed to be visible following several years of illness that prevented it, containing a link to Hannah's excellent post on the subject of TDOV.
|Travelling transgender, TDOV 2018|
Cari lettori italiani
Il 31 sarà la giornata internazionale della visibilità transgender in cui si può veramente sensibilizzare il pubblico alla realtà della nostra esistenza. Tragicamente, siamo ancora in una situazione grave di restrizioni. Però c'è sempre l'internet per farci conoscere.