The 12 Days of Dressmas

 How are you? I hope you had a lovely Christmas and that Santa brought you something nice. 

Given the amount of time off there is at this time of year, and given how long it's been since I spent a lot of daily time and trouble on my hair and makeup, I thought it would be a good opportunity to get properly dolled up for as much of the holidays as possible. This is my first report ...

 

To summarise my 15-year old blog in one paragraph: I started feeling feminine very early in life, about 5-6 years old, started dressing as a girl regularly from about 8-9 years old, tried to suppress and purge in my 20s and then finally acknowledged and embraced the fact I was trans and have dressed as a woman every day for the last 30 years or so. I've considered transition and only ever wear women's clothes now, although I now rarely present as female in public, more a sort of andro figure which, truth be told, is not really me but is a compromise that prevents trouble, be it social or medical. The main block to living as a woman, which I did for much of 2010-14, was a bout of eczema on my face in the mid-2010s that made it impossible to wear makeup or remove facial hair. This check on my development as a trans person has been devastating. I've had to be very cautious since, in case the eczema flares up again. But it's been a while and I wondered if I could live as fully as I would like to for the Christmas season, with my nicest outfits that I rarely wear, full makeup, my boldest jewellery and my hair nice and full and long. 

I'm not sure whether to call this experiment after the carol, The 12 Days of Christmas (My True Love Sent to Me) ... Perhaps it'd be the 12 Days of Missmas, the 12 Babes of Christmas, the 12 Days of Dressmas/Frockmas ... hey, how about the 12 Dames of Dressmas? The 12 Drivels of Misnomer. Whatever, this is me being me for as long as I can and hoping that my skin holds out and there are not too many interruptions from causes other than social visits, shopping and the like.

Christmas Eve

On Christmas Eve, after shopping and deliveries, and exchanging presents with neighbours, I wore my floral shift dress (you've seen it before, notably in London last year), a black cardigan, black semi-opaque tights, and some black high-heeled court shoes. The weather was wet and very windy so I stayed indoors.

Perfume of the day: Forever by Laura Biagiotti.

Christmas Day 

Although still windy, Christmas Day dawned bright and it warmed up nicely to the point when I almost had lunch outdoors. Without the wind I would have done. But the finer weather meant I could wear a light cotton dress (the same as in July) and some 20 denier nude tights with open toed shoes and go out in the sunshine.

It was so sunny at the front that I had to squint or close my eyes. But let's face it, sunlight is blissful ...

 

Or I could go out back where it was shady but very windy so my hair got blown about ... 

 

Back indoors and about to start preparing Christmas dinner ...

 

And relaxing on the sofa out of the wind ...

 

I do like this little dress which I bought last year and it's unusual to get to wear it in winter but it's so mild at the moment.

Perfume of the day: Crystal Noir by Versace.

Boxing Day

I don't know why the 26th is called Boxing Day in Britain. When I was a kid I assumed it was because there was boxing on TV, which my grandfather always enjoyed watching. Somehow men like punching each other's heads, and good luck to them with that. Here in Italy it's called St Stephen's (I mean December 26th is called that, not punching heads). 

It was another sunny day but with much less wind. After a clear night, it was quite cool to start with, hence my choosing a warmer outfit than yesterday, a very old blue wool dress, the same black cardi as on Xmas Eve and my lovely and very comfortable knee-length boots which always go well with this dress. I also got out some party tights, a pretty silver brocade pair, which are very warm. Perhaps a bit more warmth than was needed in the end as the afternoon was almost springlike and I was happy to open all the doors to get plenty of fresh mild air into my home. 

Relaxing on the terrace among the herbs ... 

 

Overlooking the sea. You can either face the sun and squint (see previous day) or turn your back to the sun and be in shadow. I've had to correct the light to show any detail and that's given this shot a picture postcard look. I quite like this one.

 

I'm worried I'm looking old these days but it's not so bad in the right light! My makeup is much lighter than it used to be - a single layer of water-based foundation rather than the oil-based foundation and powder of yore - partly so as not to aggravate my skin, but also because my facial hairs grow more slowly and are no longer black. I guess that's one rare benefit of ageing.

Lazy time on the sofa. All this posing outdoors sure wears a girl out ...

The silver brocade tights were in fashion about 15 years ago and these are one of two pairs I got at the time (these by Gipsy). I think this style deserve revival as a party accessory. Strangely, the manufacturers call the colour "gunmetal" ... and if this is what guns look like these days then our armies must be very pretty! I think they go well with the blue and black of the outfit.

Perfume of the day: Poison by Dior. 

 

I'd genuinely like feedback on my style and above all on my makeup that I feel needs improvement. 

More on this experiment as it happens. Essential shopping and a social visit are on the menu today so if I'm back in a dress it'll only be for the evening. 

 

What did Santa bring?

Did Santa bring you something for your feminine side? I hope so. 

Very occasionally I've received feminine presents from thoughtful friends but I usually have to get myself anything I want in that line. This year I bought a pretty and unique ring at a jewellery stall in the Christmas market in Monaco. It's not exactly what I was looking for but I do love the way the stones seem to be stuck on my finger rather than to a ring. A rather clever effect. I rarely wear green clothing but I do like green stones or glass in my jewellery.

The colours were just right although I'd prefer not to have had a heart shaped element, which reminds me a little of an Irish claddagh ring, which you wear with the heart on the ring pointing out or in depending on whether or not you have a lover or are looking for one. There's a heart-stopping true claddagh Christmas story at the end if you want to read it.

 

Conclusion

More on this dressing experiment as it happens. Back in the early 2010s I would think nothing of being fully femme for a week or more at a stretch. I'm just wondering if I can recapture some of that. On Boxing Day I wore earrings that jangled and it was such an affirmation, as was my hair blowing about my face in the wind - irritating, yes, but so affirming, too. This is how life should have been ... as a woman, where even little annoyances feel right.

Thanks for reading and for your feedback. 

 

Sue's Fireside Tales continued: Christmas claddagh story

When I was a student, various university societies provided food and drink for the Christmas concert. Our quota was 60 mince pies. So the day before the concert we set to rolling, filling and baking. The president of our society was wearing a claddagh ring that had been passed down to her by her Irish grandmother. After several hours of hard work we contentedly contemplated our fresh-baked golden goodies, smelling of spiced fruit and warm pastry. And the pres went to wash her hands and cried out that her precious ring was missing. We now looked at our pies in dismay. Surely her ring hadn't got baked inside one? Would we have to break them all apart till her ring was found? And then redo all our work or turn up to the concert empty-handed? We decided to wait till they cooled before setting about the miserable task. So we started washing up the mixing bowls and utensils. And then, miraculously, in a tiny gobbet of unused pastry in one bowl was the ring. Never had any of us felt so relieved. 

So it turned out well in the end but I've never wanted to make mince pies again, or wear a claddagh ring myself. And also explains some of my hesitation with this ring for Christmas.

Sue xx