Thursday, 3 February 2022

We make up for the times we lost

 Much trans culture is in nightclubs and bars, whether LGBT-dedicated or not. But so many trans people who go out late are twice the age of most of the clientele. There's nothing wrong with that, of course, but as a general observation, clubbing is for the young, often to meet potential mates and burn energy. 

I sometimes chuckle at myself, decidedly middle-aged, along with my similarly-aged friends, throwing somewhat distorted shapes on the dance floor when it's way past our bedtime. Without intending to be mean, that may seem comical, but it has shades of tragedy, too. We are making right the fact that we weren't necessarily able to go out as young trans women or men because society in our day had expectations, we were less sure of our ground and, most tragically of all, our late teens and early twenties often see us looking to find a mate and be the person we are told we are, so we suppress out trans nature accordingly. We end up actually missing out on life lived in the right order and later, when we realise that we can no longer fight the reality that we have been transgender all along, we redo the socialising in young persons' venues that we missed out on since we weren't really being ourselves the first time round. That's how it's felt for me, at least. 

I'm glad that younger trans people seem to be having a slightly less difficult time in coming out now and living life more authentically from the start.


Slimmer still

I lost 3.7 kg or 8½ pounds in January and I'm slimmer than I've been for some years. Admittedly, some of that was weight I'd put back on over the Christmas fortnight but I can see myself being back in my healthy weight range later this year.

Here's a slimming joke:

Like many people, I joined a gym at New Year but I've only just plucked up the courage to turn up. Actually, I think I might get to like it there. There was this amazing looking machine that really caught my eye and I asked the instructor if he could show me how it worked. He was so helpful. "It's easy," he said, "you select a setting, put a coin in the slot here, and a snack pops out the bottom."

A dip in the archives

I'm still slowly but surely getting together all my old photos and here's another I'd forgotten, from 2008. I was still experimenting with my look.

Sue x


  1. Your observation is indeed correct but hand in hand with that is the desire to dress younger as well. It can work but for me being 64 and wearing short skirts is not really an option now sadly. I started going out ageing after an absence of 30 years aged 51

    1. Thanks, Emma. Your observation is very valid and I'll include it in my next post. Sue x

  2. I wonder if meeting in a public place is easier? What I mean is, there's no need to arrange hired facilities and all that goes with that. Plus, the lure of being out in the world and fitting in with folk like you.

    Conversely, while the venue may be easy, getting one's nerve up to go, may be quite something else. A big public space means you can be lost in the crowd, whereas a bar or café may not offer that anonymity.

    Plus, clubs and bars - depending on which ones you pick - may not be the best for conversation. I guess it depends on what type of night out someone wants.

    1. All good and valid observations, Lynn. My post focused on just one aspect of going to clubs as an older TGirl but I'll be expanding on what you mention in my next post. Sue x

  3. Your old look is nice too, Sue.



    1. Thank you, Christine. It's sweet of you to say so. Sue x