Reflections on the revolution

 The other day, Wednesday June 17th, was the tenth anniversary of the Day the Balcony Collapsed and my life was never the same again. I took Wednesday easy as the anniversary brought up so much trauma. 

To recap very briefly, a balcony at the end of the street on a house identical to mine came crashing down. How exactly is a mystery. The agents who had let that property tried to make out that this was a sign that all the houses in the street were unsound and might be condemned. This was an attempt not only to cover up their own negligence but to try to persuade people to sell up cheap so they or other agents could cash in. The attempted fraud was large-scale and vile. 

One week after that the United Kingdom where I lived voted to leave the European Union. My business was intimately tied to Europe, like so many others after 40+ years membership of that body, and work dried up. These two incidents in the same week left me in a position where I faced the prospect of losing both my home and my livelihood.

Fortunately, a trans friend of mine who happens to be a surveyor told me her suspicions about the fallen balcony and suggested a course of action. My own balcony turned out to be sound, as were all the others. This is where having other trans friends can come into its own. My day-to-day contacts wouldn't bring me in touch with a surveyor who happens to have 40 years expertise in concrete structures. I happen to know her only because we are both trans. Similarly, having contacts, friends and relatives in Europe assisted me in moving to the Mediterranean.

The point is that you never know when your life may suddenly change because of accidents, political upheaval or unexpected health issues. To illustrate the last point, we all suffered from the recent pandemic, whether we got ill or not, yet none of us expected such a situation.

This is not the first time I've been in dramatic situations. When I was a newborn baby living in a foreign country, a war elsewhere in the region had a domino effect on the politics of surrounding states. What had been a sleepy, pro-Western nation suddenly turned pro-Soviet and anti-Western and threw foreigners out. I don't have a proper birth certificate because my father just had time to get the British embassy to issue a consular one for me just minutes before the building was burnt down by a rioting mob. It's been a bureaucratic issue for me ever since, as if a two-week-old baby somehow has responsibility for what the so-called grown-ups around it are doing.

So the point is, as countries succumb to malignant narcissists like Trump or psycopaths like Putin or the xenophobic incompetents like the procession of Prime Ministers the UK has had, that you have to have a Plan B for life. Just hoping that things will improve where you are is wasted effort. You have to make things work for you and, ideally, for everyone else around you. I'm doing quite well now in a totally different country and I don't actually miss the old life. I wish things hadn't worked out the way they did but as I see the ongoing economic, political and social damage caused by Brexit xenophobia in Britain, I can only congratulate myself on seeing a way out. After ten years of chaos and division without firm outcome, Britain is never now going to get out of the mess it's created for itself. Frankly, it's a country that's been increasingly poorly governed over the last 150 years or so but this is a real low. Historians of the future may well use it as an object lesson.

I'll add to this. I was raised in a cult. A cult where religion, nationalism, cultural supremacism and the narcissism of its leaders and subleaders were the chief components; fear, shame, violence and threats were its chief tools of enforcement. So much was condemned by them and being trans was definitely deemed bad. I've been deprogramming from this over the last thirty years. Now I'm not ashamed to be trans any more. I'm cautious and careful, but not ashamed. The cultism of the current crop of leaders is something I may talk about soon to advise on what theorists believe causes it and how one can override it. But at the end of the day, self-acceptance, mutual assistance, and resistance always beat domineering, bullying, threats, hatred and blind support, be it for political, religious or other notions. 

In this Pride month, I've been trying to focus on positive news, on how trans people and allies keep living and creating and being constructive citizens. I think I should also point out the survivability of the trans community after centuries of misunderstanding and persecution, at least in Western society. Other people's ideas of trans people and how to suppress them come and go, and yet nature keeps producing trans people. Maybe, just maybe, nature knows what it's doing and the jerks don't.

All praise and support, therefore, to my fellow bloggers in places that have become transphobic in recent years, like the USA and Great Britain. Well done Marian at Dotting I's and Crossing T's for working to get a second passport from another country; well done Stana at Femulate for not giving up when Trump won the election but for continuing to produce such varied, enjoyable and very popular content; well done Hannah for running her local trans group and being true to herself and her preferences despite online opposition and MAGA mania; well done Lynn at Yet Another Transgender Blog for continuing her group and dealing with her political representatives; well done Dee for being herself despite difficult personal circumstances; well done Lotte of Still in the Pink Fog for wearing her trans-indicative hair and nail varnish and tattoos in the way she wants them; and well done Carla of Pink Fog - Trans in Spain who, like me, has escaped abroad but continues to concern herself about trans rights in Britain; and on and on, I can think of so many of my friends who now live life on their terms and support others to live as they need to. You can't put us down. And, as I said, Nature keeps producing us, generation on generation, defying all the various theories and opposition to our existence. 

Happy Pride month.

 

Hot

Today the promised heat has come. I am wearing very short shorts and small tee top because any more would be too hot. I'm not ashamed to admit that I've ditched my bra. 

I've just been for a swim in the lovely outdoor pool, which this year has got some pretty statues round it, put there by an artist I know who works in bronze. I think they're really beautiful, especially in the setting. And I feel great affinity with their unashamed femininity; a shared pride, if you will. 

  

 

So, I may have abandoned my home and business in Britain, much to the delight of the ex-friends who thought it fun to see me damaged in their xenophobic rage; but now I enjoy 300 days of sunshine a year in a subtropical paradise, have new friends, new interests and am way healthier, more relaxed and better off with many more human rights, whilst their economy and lifestyle and country diminishes. I'd rather see people thrive than be crushed but since many don't see it that way I continue to press for trans rights and to resist the haters.

Sue x